Im sorry I havent been able to blog in a while. they blocked it from work. I did take my measurements as of 2/27: arm: 21", thigh: 35", neck: 18", chest: 47", bust: 45" hips: 62.5," waste: 54.5". I didnt weigh myself. its easier to just take measurements every week because I have the tape measure right here. Today is a week later, but there shouldnt be any change, I didnt do anything different this week and if I got bigger over the last week, I think ill be even more depressed.
     I did do laundry this morning. I broke into a sweat from hanging up closes, and my legs where on fire from standing that long.. it was maybe 20 mins, and all I was doing was standing there. Im so ashamed of myself and how far I let myself go. I was giving myself a mental peptalk. telling myself thats its good that I forced myself to stand that long and that I hurt so bad after! it means that next time it will be easier if I keep it up! But I shouldnt have felt that way from standing up. Because it hurts so bad when I move around, I let the house completely go to hell. I had a lady come over who runs a cleaning business. She charges 25 an hour with a 2 hour min. which isnt that bad.  But for her to clean two rooms, it will take the two hours. and I have to do most of it ahead of time. its going to take two hours to sweep, mop, vacuum, and wipe things down. One hand, I need the help, on the other hand, if I have to do half of it myself I might as well save the 50 bucks.
    My miss my baby lizzy. She was so sad sunday night, she was on the floor crying so hard for over an hour, nothing I did could cheer her up. My heart was breaking for her, she said she missed her nana. So at 7pm I took her over there. I felt guilty because I knew she would miss school, and I was worried I was spoiling her by caving in like that. But she was so sad and I just wanted to make her feel better. She's staying again tonight because she doesnt have school tomorrow, and she seems like she's feeling better when I talked to her and my mom.
    Another messed up thing since I gained all that weight in fall, I havent had a normal cycle since. I know partly because im getting older, but most of it is because of the weight. It took 3-4 months for me to even have my cycle and its been none stop since. It gets heavy and then slows down, but never stops. I want to see the dr, but there isnt much they can do about it until I lose the weight. I should go see him anyways, maybe he can help. But since I havent seen a doctor in years, its going to be hard to get an appointment to see anyone. I promised myself last week that I would make an appointment, but I never did.
    Im going to do the visalus shakes, again. My good friend Meagan is going to start her 90 day challenge this weekend and so am I! I WILL do it the whole 90 days.. I will follow through with something for once! Once I get started and show results, Ill let other people start the challenge with me. I dont want to encourage people if it doesnt work for me.  I did try it once and couldnt stick to it.
    I do have good news. I made a LOT of progress on my student loans today. I filled out and sent off the last of the paperwork I needed it. Now, its just a waiting game for the stuff to get processed. I have one loan in default and thats holding it up for everything else. I did send out the promise to pay form. Once they process that form, I can get that last loan consolidated with the rest of them. But school starts in April. and thats only 4 weeks away. That should be enough time, and everything will be okay. :)